I Have No More Use For My Eyes

I shall now be opening an E-bay account and selling my eyesight to the highest bidder. Why? Because I have seen Batman Begins. That was quite simply a spectacular movie. By far, the best superhero movie I had seen in my lifetime. And then, a new life began for me. No longer was I Peter, a simple man with simple goals and a simple existence. At 12:01 this morning, as the Grandview Theater darkened and the crowd silenced itself, a new Peter was born. A Peter that had seen The Dark Knight, and had found something that only Sir Edmund Hillary, Neil Armstrong and Buddha had found. I had found Enlightenment, and its name was Awesome. Now, like those great explorers into worlds beyond, I and those touched by the beauty and terrific might of this piece of art have but one purpose. We are committed to leading all others into the new future, a future with Awesome, and Christian Bale, and Heath Ledger, and more Awesome, and Gary Oldman, and yet more Awesome still. In fact, were it possible to process Awesome into light sweet crude oil, there would no longer be an energy crisis. This testament to the cinema would quite simply be the Saudi Arabia of Awesome. Multiplied several hundred octillion times. And then multiplied by an even bigger number. And then squared. Some might even say that this would be more awesome than Abraham Lincoln doing capoeira atop the Eiffel Tower on the surface of the Sun. I am some of those people.

Go see the Dark Knight. Quickly. You've already wasted enough time reading this post. You're not in the theater yet. Drive fools, drive!!


*Clarification: Batman Begins was the beginning of Awesome. Dark Knight is the zenith. Therefore, I am not wrong in citing that movie in sentence three. However, the statement is rather convoluted. I was just too messed up by the greatness of both films to think clearly.